Merry Christmas Sydney! We love and miss you so much sweet boy! The holidays are so hard to celebrate without you in our arms. I know you’re safe in Jesus’ arms and you’re in heaven celebrating Jesus’ Birthday. You’re such a special blessing!
Your daddy and mommy are in a much better place than we were last year when you first passed away and our pain was so new and immense. We were still in shock, numb and feeling so much pain especially during the first few months. It took all of our strength just to get through the holidays without you, but we did it. Some how together we put one foot in front of the other. Over time, we have learned how to accept the pain, we have learned how to live with it everyday, and we have tried to build strength in our days. Now we are finding more peace and can find happy moments once again during the holiday season but it doesn’t make us miss you any less. We still have moments that sting. Our happy moments are different without your presence. We are even more grateful for all the blessings in our life. You taught us that. Thank you for being a special boy, for being you, and for being our son. We are so proud to be your parents.
Last year we bought you your first Christmas ornament and this year we bought two more for you. This would have been your second Christmas with us and you would have been 14 months old. We want to continue this tradition of collecting ornaments every year for you. It makes us happy to acknowledge you this way.
The other day I thought about this tradition and I felt such sadness along with the joy. As much as we find comfort in collecting ornaments for you, it also makes me sad to think of our house being filled with ornaments that we’ve collected for you but you’re not here. I thought about what it would be like 17 years from now, with 17 or more ornaments, and the thought of you not being here as an eighteen year old man....the young adult we would have watched grow all of these years. I feel such sadness that daddy and mommy don’t get to be a part of everyday life. How I wish you were here. You will always be the light in our hearts, always and forever.
No comments:
Post a Comment